Is it Time…

I mentioned the other day how it feels as though Hopelessly and I don’t have the hope that this will be our miracle month.  As I mentioned this has it’s up side, but I think it has been considerably contributing to me feeling that we are going no where.

Anyway, I have been having a few better days (who would have though I could have more than two in a row).  In fact I was chatting to a friend today and she asked me how I was doing and I had to pause and think why she was asking me with such intensity as though there was something not right.  For a while there I forgot I have been pretty down for ages and lost my mom under two months ago.  See there can be brighter days!

The better days bring me to thinking that maybe it is time… time to let hope back in.  I know that ol’ b!tch can cause absolute hell, getting hopes up and then letting us down, but maybe it is better to  hope.

A few months ago, after another ‘no improvement’ session at the FS I gave up the vitamins.  I mean there is no point in spending money on vitamins if you have no sperm and no hope of getting pregnant is there?  We gave up the timed baby dancing months and months ago after the zero SA result.  And I have simply not bothered with any hope – what’s the point hey?

But Hopelessly has now been on his new protocol (Menopur 3 times a week & Ovidrel once a week) for over four months.  And this new protocol comes after the three months on Pregnyl.  In reality I don’t think it would be unrealistic to start Hoping (there’s that word) that maybe, just maybe he could be making some spermies now.  I mean sperm take 72 days to form and he has had way longer than that now for the hormones to work their magic.  So maybe it is time to go back on the vits and start making whooppeee at the right times.  Oh and I guess along with that goes eating properly.

Whatcha think folks, am I crazy to let that ol’ b!tch back in or should I leave her out in the cold for a little while longer so the good times can last?

About MommyAtLast

Finally a Mommy to our Medical Miracle IVF Boy / Girl Twins who were born in November 2011. We overcame azoospermia using hormone therapy for my hubby to conceive our precious Hope Babes on our 4th IVF.
This entry was posted in azoospermia, fertility Treatment, Infertility, Male Factor Infertility, TTC and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

10 Responses to Is it Time…

  1. Bratty says:

    Hopeful….believe..let hope is the only thing is this whole process that you have any control with….

  2. Mash says:

    Let hope in and leave expectation at the door 🙂

  3. Kitty8218 says:

    I say let her in and embrace her! Hope and belief can create miracles and in order to get that positive you need to be positive! That’s my new motto and I’m sticking to it. So go forth and be hopeful and take one day at a time. Our mind and body work in conjunction and if we’re not positive from within then how can we expect it to yeild our desired results! So manifest it and believe with all your heart and soul and you will be rewarded 🙂

  4. Julz says:

    Somehow my hopeless days were worse than days of hope+letdown… Hope is far easier to to hug than hopelessness 🙂

  5. Camilla says:

    I ditto Mash xxx

    And mmm on the vitamin issue – I also stopped…feeling a tad rebellious but have been thinking that I should start taking them again.

    And on the BD…just go for it whenever you feel like it – I am a firm believer that we naturally feel like making whooppee at exactly the right moment…

    On the healthy food front – suppose that too, but there is always space for chocolate 🙂

  6. Paige says:

    I’m so sorry about the cards you’ve been dealt. Crack open the door for Hope and see what happens.

  7. ttcnot2easy says:

    Not crazy. I think it’s a good thing, MiW. And I really love what Mash says too…. That girl talks sense! 🙂

  8. AnxiousMummy says:

    Here from ICLW. I’m sorry you got stuck in what feels like such a hopeless situation. It definitely sounds like now would be the time to let a little bit of hope in though. Hang in there!

  9. Tam says:

    I say go for it! My hubby doesn’t have the sperm issues that your DH has but he does have low FSH which does affect sperm and the menopur makes a world of difference so you just never know.

    Here’s hoping for you 😉

  10. theworms says:

    I always let hope in, you never know 🙂


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