We’re in it!

Friday’s appointment went exactly as expected.  I was so relieved about that.  I kept promising myself that I would not anticipate what the doctor would say, I would not get ahead of him and have my own plan in my mind because when I do that it just ends up upsetting me when things aren’t exactly the way I imagined.  I guess that’s the whole story of infertility, none of this is quite the way we anticipated.  But despite my promises to myself after the results I knew we had to go with IVF and so I couldn’t help myself figuring it all out in my mind.  My worst fears for the appointment were that the doc would say we can’t go ahead this month for some reason, or that he would say we should give it a few more months and see if we get more of an improvement.  The last six weeks to the follow up test gave me the chance to come to terms with the idea of doing IVF and I couldn’t bare the thought of having to wait.  I have been so calm and I was terrified that if we had to delay any longer my calm state would go completely out the window.

So thank heavens Dr S followed the plan in my crazy brain.

He was amazing!  I was convinced I would suffer another SNAIF (Sleepless Night Attributed to Infertility) the night before the appointment and so I climbed into bed with a notebook and pen and wrote down every question that was swirling in my brain before turning off the lights.  It worked and I slept relatively well.  And Dr S patiently answered every one of them.  He has such an awesome way of answering your question in a simple enough way that you understand but also that manages not to be condescending at all.  I think he started off giving us info assuming we knew nothing or very little, but as I came out with the questions he realised we had done some homework and weren’t totally ignorant about what was involved.

So on day 1 of my next cycle I phone the clinic to book my day 3 scan to check for cysts or any other obstacles and on day three after the scan I will get my meds and we start IVF with ICSI!  Because I had some concerns about how short some of my cycles have been I will be going for a day 6 scan and we will take it from there.  When I asked about PICSI he said yes, no problem we can do that.  He said that there is no evidence that it has a significantly improved success rate, but that it might help to ensure we get the most mature sperm.

After the appointment I let my IF sisters know the outcome and a friend of mine asked if I was excited.  It’s funny I’m not sure it had occurred to me to be excited about this, but when she asked and I started thinking about it – I am.  I am excited.  Not in a jump up and down kind of way.  Not because the idea of scans with the dildo cam excite me.  Not because shooting up hormones excites me.  Not because the idea of holding my breath for two weeks excites me.  Not because I ‘just know’ it’s going to work – I don’t have that kind of blind optimism.   But because we are doing something.  You’ve “gotta be in it to win it” and we will be in it!

So hold on folks brace yourselves for those dull posts about scans and follies and ER and fertilisation rates and ET and waiting waiting waiting.  For now we are starting with the waiting for AF to show.


About MommyAtLast

Finally a Mommy to our Medical Miracle IVF Boy / Girl Twins who were born in November 2011. We overcame azoospermia using hormone therapy for my hubby to conceive our precious Hope Babes on our 4th IVF.
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11 Responses to We’re in it!

  1. Lesley says:

    Here we go wheee!! We need to meet for the ceremonial handover of the KTNF this weekend. Can’t have you doing a IVF without it!

  2. samcy says:

    Yay all sounds excellent! And you’re right, you’ve got to be in it to win it. Hoping and praying that you get your first time lucky number 1 IVF BFP 🙂


  3. Cathy Nel says:

    So when is AF expected??????????
    Yay this is so damn exciting and i know how you feel about being in it to win it! We have a chance and we’re the closest we’ve ever been to being pregnant. It’s now up to us to trust the process, Doctors and ourselves!!!
    So looking forward to the ‘dull’ posts and updates!!!!!
    It’s fantastic news that you’ve been given the green light and that your appointment went exactly as planned (love it when that happens)! xxx

  4. skrambled says:

    That sounds great! I will be following along and hoping.

  5. Lol @ SNAIF. Damn you SNAIF!!!

  6. Kristin says:

    I’m glad your plan and the doctor’s plan were so perfectly in line. I hope and pray you’ll have success soon.


  7. tasivfer says:

    I think it’s exciting to be starting IVF – you’ve already had to do so much and wait so much and put up with so much! Here’s for AF showing up soon so you can take the first steps in this new journey. XX

  8. Laura says:

    Happy ICLW! I know what you mean about doing something instead of just waiting around. I am glad that you are getting to make progress!

  9. ttcnot2easy says:

    Oh dull schmull.. I’m excited about reading all those posts!! You are in phase 2 and it is so damned awesome!! I’m so glad the H’s have reached this page!! Whahooooooooooooo!!!! It seems mad how quickly it arrived too!

    Got to love Dr S.. he really is the best. Hands down!


  10. Kim says:

    I know exactly how you feel about being excited to be starting IVF, I am excited too. It feels so good to finally be moving forward.

    Good luck with your cycle!

    Happy ICWL and thanks for stopping by my blog.


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