I have it all planned

Being the complete control freak that I am (and somehow rather than easing off on this journey I am getting worse) I have a plan for this IVF. You see it’s not really very easy for me to get time off for scans and ER and ET and blood tests. I only work in the office three days a week as it is so taking time out on those three days is not very cool. But of course only working three days also makes it a whole lot easier in some ways.

So I have figured out that with my plan which requires a CD3 scan and a CD6 scan the best possible day for AF to arrive is a Wednesday. So that CD3 falls on a Friday (I don’t work Fridays) and CD6 falls on a Monday (I work from home on Mondays) and then whatever happens after that will matter less as I won’t already have been late by the time it leaves my control completely.

So that means with my perfect planning AF can now arrive – TODAY, it’s Wednesday and I am ready for her!

Of course the problem with irregular cycles is that I have no idea when she will come. My average cycle is 24½ days, but they vary from 28 days (only once in the last year) and 22 days. Today is day 22 so that means it would be one of my shortest cycles if she arrived today, so it’s very unlikely to happen today. DefTTC always says that I have the ability to control by body with my mind. The time my period was so late he was sure it was because I wished it so. Please let him be right and now I ORDER AF to arrive. Well… unless she wants to stay away for 40 weeks or so because our miracle happened… but really I have no expectation or even hope of that. Dr S was very clear we do not have enough sperm for natural conception.

I have to laugh at myself actually. I have been reading blogs of women preparing for IVF for ages and every women seems to do this post, the where is AF, when might she arrive, count down etc etc etc. And I really thought I wouldn’t do this. But here I am, it is the only thing I can think of so what else could I possibly post about.

The great thing though is that although I have it all planned and today really would be perfect, I am actually still feeling pretty relaxed and will accept whatever comes. Oh please let this feeling last.

 And finally I went to sleep holding TNTNF last night, I made my one wish that I get our baby in my arms at the end of this and focused on all the love and support I am surrounded with as we embark on this nerve wracking ride.

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About MommyAtLast

Finally a Mommy to our Medical Miracle IVF Boy / Girl Twins who were born in November 2011. We overcame azoospermia using hormone therapy for my hubby to conceive our precious Hope Babes on our 4th IVF.
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7 Responses to I have it all planned

  1. Laura says:

    Thanks for your message on my blog. I hope you will be able to use some of my research in the next nine months! I see we share the love for planning and scheduling.. unfortunately IVF was one thing I could not schedule for. In a way you have to go with the flow and accept that it might all go to a schedule or it might be unpredictable. One day your follicles look ok, the next they need a bit more time and all the dates you had planned go out of the window. It helps when you have the exact attitude you wrote about and be ready to accept whatever comes! Good luck!!

  2. Cathy Nel says:

    Here’s hoping AF shows today! Good luck and looking forward to your updates 🙂
    xxx

  3. Marion says:

    I can so relate to what you’re saying about being a control freak – I’ve only recently realised I am also a control freak. Unfortunately some things are beyond our control…

  4. DeterminedDory says:

    Wishing you the best for your cycle, and sending lots of relaxed, go-with-the-FLOW thoughts your way!

  5. ttcnot2easy says:

    You’re a closet Virgo, my friend! 😉

    From my IVF experience, it’s good to go into it relaxed, expectant (of the procedures) and optimistic. You’ve asked so many questions that you’re fortunate enough to be prepared for all the bits that are involved.

    My legs and stuff are all crossed that this will be the only one you guys need!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  6. Nic says:

    Good luck!

    I agree with the other comments – its good to be relaxed and know as much as you can. Parts of the process are out of your control and one has to learn to “go with the flow” – difficult as that sometimes can be for a control freak.

  7. Jaime says:

    Hoping AF arrived!!! If not, I sure it will all work out for the best, even if it isn’t how we planned it. I am planner too and this process really showed me that I AM NOT in control. It was difficult to accept, but in the end, I did. Wishing you the best for this cycle. I can’t wait to see how it goes!!!

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