Hysteroscopy Here We Come

I will learn that if there is an inconvenient time for things to happen and my body can arrange it, it will ensure that the most inconvenient thing happens. So with the whole family arriving for my Mom’s send off this weekend when would be the least convenient moment for me to have the Hysteroscopy? And if Friday would be the least convenient moment when would AF have to arrive to ensure this maximum inconvenient timing? Yup Sunday!

So Sunday morning AF arrived – dumb b!tch! Which means that the hysteroscopy has to happen this week or wait until next month! And while I know that I was relieved at being ‘forced’ into a month’s wait before our next IVF, I do not want to be forced into another month’s wait.

So I didn’t get much sleep last night, another SNAIF (Sleepless Night Attributed to Infetility) in fact only about three hours! I tossed and turned and weighed up the pros and cons and then when I dozed off I dreamt of hospitals and being put under and finding issues and busy confused restless dreams. And when I woke up I decided that I want to go ahead and get this done. I don’t want to be forced to wait. I’m not guaranteeing that we will definitely do the IVF next month, I want to wait and see how we are doing emotionally before committing to that, but I don’t want to be ready and not be able to go ahead. I also do not want another month of restless dreams about this damn procedure, I want it done.

So I phoned the clinic this morning to see whether there was any chance of them fitting me in on Thursday? And whoo hooo they can. So Thursday lunchtime I head into hospital and get the Hysteroscopy done. Of course my Dad arrives on Wednesday night and now I’m going to have to tell him about this procedure, which I would rather have avoided getting into with him, but… what can I do. This process is really teaching me that I have no control, any control I think I have is just an illusion. I guess this could be the lesson I have to learn from infertility.

Oh and Thursday afternoon I am supposed to be delivering training to 12 people, but I guess I will be dumping work into it again, but that’s just the way the cookie crumbles.

I think that DefTTC thinks I’m slightly crazy, although maybe it’s not just slightly crazy. I am fairly certain he thinks it would be better waiting until next month and deal with one thing at a time, i.e. my Mom’s send off this month and then hysteroscopy next month and then IVF the month after that, but…

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About MommyAtLast

Finally a Mommy to our Medical Miracle IVF Boy / Girl Twins who were born in November 2011. We overcame azoospermia using hormone therapy for my hubby to conceive our precious Hope Babes on our 4th IVF.
This entry was posted in fertility Treatment, ivf, TTC and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to Hysteroscopy Here We Come

  1. Cathy Nel says:

    That bloody Murphy! I tell you he’s a pain in the backside!!!!!!!!
    Good luck for Thursday and i’m with you on that one, rather get it done, no use having it lingering in the back of your mind and more SNAIF!!!
    Please KUP
    xxx

  2. Heather says:

    SNAIF, I love it and might have to steal it. I’ve had plenty of them myself.

    I’m so sorry your cycle didn’t work out. I hope the hysteroscopy goes smoothly this week!

    ICLW

  3. Mash says:

    Good luck, and you take care of yourself. You’ve got a lot of emotionally charged stuff lying ahead of you!

  4. darylfaure says:

    Hey sweetie. I am just catching up on all your blogs now, and just wanted to say I am sorry you have been having a rough time of it. The failure of your first IVF is always very hard, but it is important you acknowledge your loss and mourn it properly, as only by doing that will you be able to get to the place where you are ready to try again.
    Please don’t worry about the hysteroscopy. I have had 2 done, and have not had any side effects or anything to keep me bed ridden after them. Just a quick in and out at the hospital, and feeling right as rain straight after.
    I hope you have a special day on Saturday scattering your moms ashes and sharing wonderful memories. What a lovely place to do, and I just love Boulders as well.
    Take care of yourself and be kind and gentle to you. Don’t give up – your dreams will come true one day.

  5. SCY says:

    Thinking of you as you face the procedure!

    xxx

  6. Lacie says:

    Thanks for stopping by my blog! I love your writing style. You and I have a lot in common with the way we think about things. “It must be the science, the science is key. Er, wait, I had perfect embryos…”

    If you have an iPod, download some of “The Meditation Poscast.” They are FREE and they truly put my brain into a different, more relaxed state. Its really amazing.

    Best of luck to you!

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